Being a mom is one of the greatest blessings a woman could ever have in life. Being able to influence your children in a way that will help them be better contributors to society is a great and amazing journey.
However, you know that being a mom is also one of the most difficult jobs on the planet and it can really wear you out. Especially when you have to work and raise kids, it’s a whole other ball game that can really throw your life out of balance.
I have been in this position myself (as an interior design business coach) and I understand the difficulties at hand. I have also learned that there are tweaks you can make to help things be more balanced between your work and raising your children.
After you read this blog post, I hope that you will have some new solid ideas (and maybe even spark some new ideas of your own) to make your life flow a little bit better.
Abandon the Guilt
There is nothing like guilt to give you that feeling like you are not doing things the best way you can. When you feel like you are not measuring up at work or with your children, it can really extract power and energy from you. When you feel like you’re failing as a mom because you can’t be there all of the time it can put a damper on everything else that you are doing.
So, I would say to abandon the guilt because nobody is perfect and no one will ever be perfect. The best thing to do is to make the most out of the time you have with them. If you only have 20 minutes in the morning to really engage with them, make that the most precious time that you spend with them. If you are getting them dressed and feeding them breakfast, do it in a way that touches their hearts.
For example, if you are dressing them tell them something encouraging for the day. Tell them how smart they are. Talk to them about life and how you’re there for them if they need to talk. Think of one thing that you could focus on with each child before they go off to school. Having these meaningful moments helps you break off that guilt because you’re spending these little moments with them every day and it adds up to a lot in the end.
Look Into High Quality Child Care
If your kids are able to stay with grandparents or aunts that you love and trust that is a bonus!
If not, consider nannies or babysitters who have a long-term history of commitment to families. This way you know that they are equipped at handling many types of circumstances and different age groups. They can provide solid references, view background checks, and testimonials. Having a solid nanny or babysitter will put your mind at ease that while you’re out making money, they are being well taken care of.
Simplify the Mornings
Mornings can be a great time of frenzy getting everyone ready for school or daycare. One way to simplify the mornings is to have everything ready the night before. Or, if you’re an overachiever maybe on a Sunday night have a place set aside, where you have their clothes lined up for the week (or part of the week) so that it’s already set and ready to go. Another option if the kids are old enough is that they can help you get things ready too. Maybe you can even turn it into a game to build some family time in the evening. Like whoever can get their clothes ready and lunch bags packed first gets some kind of incentive!
Try to Stay Connected Throughout the Day
If you have really young children you can send them a video of you reading a story, or singing a song to them. If you have older children and maybe you might have to miss an event or two because of work, why not write them a letter encouraging them. Get a good luck charm showing your support of them. Take your child out that weekend for lunch to catch up on anything you missed.
Plan a Family Outing
It would be great if this could be something that was done on a regular basis. Where they expect to do a certain activity or outing at a certain time. Maybe it’s not every week. Maybe it’s every other week or maybe it’s once a month. Have something in place that makes them feel they have secure time with you. You can even make deciding on it a family affair, to pitch ideas and decide together what their family activity should be.
How do you feel about these ideas? Do you feel like you are able to start doing at least one or two of them? Start out with one or two for the month and add some more later. Remember that kids remember the small things as they grow up. They’ll remember the big lavish vacations, but long term they remember the opportunities you took in daily moments, to make them feel valuable and loved. I think we can all do that quite well!
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